Archive for June 13th, 2010

13
Jun
10

Change for the better… part 2!

yesss.. may part 2 agad!
Just this week, we received news that some of the associates in our BU will be undergoing a 4-month training in the other department. And I’m one of them. Bam!
I really didn’t expect it to be this soon, so I’m a little shocked.  I thought that the previous batch was the last group to be transferred there.  BUT, our boss made an assurance to us that there will be no lateral transfer to the other department… and I’m holding on that assurance.  It will just be a 4-month training, a win-win thing they say, and by November, we’ll be back in 1st BU.
Right now, I don’t know what to think.  There are a lot of possibilities, and I’m trying to look at the good ones.  I trust my bosses, and I trust my company.  If they think this is a good path, I’ll go and follow.
So, I’ll just wait… wait and see where this ship will take me.

And with these things happening in my work life… this song by The Calling is probably my theme right now.. here’s Things Will Go My Way

“Things Will Go My Way”

I came to tell you
How it all began
Nothing seems to work out right
I’m broken down again
So hold me now
And say it’s not forever
Maybe someday
In time

Things will go my way
Things will go my way

I’ve pushed to get through
The crowds in twisted souls
Just to find I’m right back here
Doing what I’m told
So take my hands
Don’t let me surrender
‘Cuz maybe someday
Yeah, in time

Things will go my way
Things will go my way

For all the lies
I’ve tasted
Just looking for the truth
For all the dreams I’m chasing
Well what am I to do
When everything’s against me
The answers are all wrong
I’m hoping that I’ll find out
It was worth it all along

So hold me now
And say it’s not forever
Maybe someday
In time

Things will go my way
Things will go my way
Things will go my way

For all the lies
I’ve tasted
Just looking for the truth
For all the dreams I’m chasing
Well what am I to do
When everything’s against me
The answers are all wrong
I’m hoping that I’ll find out

Things will go my way
Things will go my way

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13
Jun
10

Change for the better

One of the activities in our company for the month of May is the Performance Appraisal.  During this time, the bosses assess each associate’s performances on the first half of the year.  And the rating that we’ll achieve on our PA will somehow affect the mid-year bonus that we’ll be getting the next month.
I could say that it’s has been a disappointing first semester for me. Firstly, my tardiness counter was continuously going up.  I even reached the limit where I’ll be receiving a verbal warning! It was alarming, and I had to remind myself that I should do some adjusting. Go back to my usual routines. And wag ng magpapa-BI, as much as possible. Haha! kidding.
Secondly, my body clock was a disaster.  I’m always sleepy whenever I go to work… and during meetings and trainings, I was crazy sleepy.  Sometimes, I end up not understanding anything about the discussion (note: sometimes).  And there’s no one to blame but me… oh, and also the creators of facebook.
Lastly, I lost my focus on my current project.  Not that I didn’t understand the whole thing.  It’s just that I didn’t get the feeling that I really know this project by heart.  I didn’t feel my connection, my passion in this project.  But I still did my best, I think.
So, when the time arrived that they’re informing me about my PA rating, I knew it.  I expected that it would go down again.  And true enough; it was my lowest PA rating so far.  And it’s all about the “Initiative”.
Aside from the fact that I did a huge blunder in the project that affected some of my co-members, they said that I don’t have that “initiative” thing in me.  As a DE2, they expected a lot from me/us.  Of course, after that level, we’ll be the next officers in the group.  So they really expected a lot, and I disappointed them.  Being initiative is really a big problem of me.  I’m afraid of volunteering because I’m afraid of not doing the task right.  Self-confidence it is.  But I’m only like this when I know that I don’t have the full knowledge about the task.   I can still raise my hand and assign myself on the task when I know that I can perform it well, I think.
My bosses were really alarmed with what’s happening to me.  They asked me what are my problems, and I said the things I wrote up there ^ .  I explained these things, and they accepted it.  I said that I’d go back to my old me on the next months, and do my best on the next projects or tasks.
The only thing that saddens me right now is that I feel that I lost their trusts in me.  It seems like they think that I’m not capable anymore of doing a task quickly’c something like that.  And I really can’t blame them.  I feel the envy with my fellow batch mates who are doing well right now, but I’m turning this envy into inspiration.
I’ll try my best to be at their level, to be more active, to meet their expectations, and to be more focused.  Hopefully… It’s not too late.



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“Quoty Quotes”

@ Motto
"Win as if you were used to it; Lose as if you enjoyed it for a change."

~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o

@ Songs
Live Like We're Dying - Kris Allen
"We only got 86 400 seconds in a day to turn it all around or throw it all away. We gotta tell ‘em that we love ‘em while we got the chance to say.. Gotta live like we’re dying"

~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o

@ Books
Are you afraid of the dark - Sidney Sheldon
"Do you go there often?"
"I used to go there when I wanted to escape."
Kelly looked at him, puzzled. "Escape from what?"
He hesitated. "Loneliness. I felt less lonely
there."
He glanced at Kelly and smiled. "I haven't been there since I met you."

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